Random Brushstrokes or a Masterpiece?

We are all "busy" people. It's a strange phenomenon in our society. It's almost like a competition. We all try to compare schedules and see who's busiest. I guess it's a way to make us feel more important.

Today, I was sitting in staff meeting, and our Pastor was talking about the importance of spiritual formation. I must confess, my mind was on the long, "very important" list I had to accomplish and not on my own spiritual formation, let alone the spiritual formation of others.

I proceeded to go to a funeral service where one of the people there began telling me how busy she was. As she was talking incessantly about her busy schedule and all of the important things she was doing, I heard myself--my own selfish attitude of "busy-ness" and self-importance. It was as if I were standing in a mirror. It was a huge wake-up call to me. If I'm "too busy" for spiritual formation, then there's something wrong with my focus, my purpose, my calling. It should be the core of what I do, not something leftover for when I "have time".

David says in Psalm 8, "When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him?"

When was the last time that I reflected on the beauty of the heavens, the works of His fingers? When did I stop to thank Him for the amazing changing backdrop He creates for us everyday?

I'm the type of person who thrives on "making good time" on a road trip. I could care less about the sites, so long as I beat my previous time. As a matter of fact, I can remember when I actually got frustrated with my husband because he wanted to stop and look at a really cool rock formation in New Mexico, and I didn't want to stop because I was "making record time". But he made me stop, and even took time to climb the formation. I sat in the car and tapped on the steering wheel and watched the clock, waiting for him to return, wondering what was taking him so long! He experienced first-hand "the works of God's fingers". I experienced nothing but frustration and self-pity.

I am a busy person. I like having a full schedule. It's a choice I make. I like new challenges. I like feeling like I've helped someone, or figured out how to organize something, or putting in long hours on a project. I truly enjoy work. But with that work comes the balance of resting in, pondering, considering, learning from & listening to the Creator. If our first stop isn't with Him, then how can we make sense of the rest?

My favorite artist is Monet. I've been to the Louvre, Museum D'Orsay, the National Gallery in London, among other museums with fantastic Monet collections. Have you ever seen a Monet up close? I love standing up close to the Monet. In some museums, you can almost press your nose up against the canvas. I love looking at the brushstrokes, and then stepping back and seeing a masterpiece. Sometimes, that is how I live life, only I'm concentrating so hard on the brush strokes, and standing so close--almost right in the middle of the painting. But the painting doesn't make any sense to me. It's frustrating to me because I've forgotten to step back. Then, I step back, open my eyes, and see the picture as a whole. Everything makes so much more sense.

That's what God desires from us--to step back and spend that time with Him so He can show us life through His eyes--to be in constant relationship with Him, the Master Creator. Nothing outside of that relationship matters. Paul knew this. He wrote to the Philippians, "I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord." Knowing You, Jesus -- there is no greater thing!

Dear Lord, Thank You for reminding me of your greatness. Thank You for reminding me of the beauty You created. Thank You for loving me and being mindful of me, even when I too often bring You only my leftovers. Lord, help me to bring You my firstfruits. I want to give You my best. Help me to channel my busy-ness and balance it with quality time spent with You and my family. Help me to be a model of health that stems only from You. Help me to press on, but press on looking upward, and not lost in the busy-ness of the details. Help me to see the big picture, and my role in it. I love You, Lord.